“He who angers you conquers you” (Elizabeth Kenny). Arguing leaves one and typically both sides at a loss, especially in marital relationships and through argumentative parenting. Do not be a fault finder and persistently tell people what they are doing wrong. Instead, genuinely praise the other person first and then make your requests known tactfully. Ask yourself what the other person wants that will encourage, inspire, and motivate him or her to accomplish a specific objective. Don’t become angry and let fuming out on others only reap their resentment and possible defiance in return.
“Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one” (Benjamin Franklin). We cannot be peaceful and angry at the same time. Remember, delay smothers and soothes the blazing fiery emotions of anger. People may not recall what you said, but they remember how you made them feel. Do not let your emotions of anger fester overnight being our subconscious minds are constantly working for or against us 24 hours daily. Minimize and eradicate anger by using your conscious mind to forgive and give thanks, often. Gratitude leads to happiness, not the other way around.
“For myself I am an optimist—it does not seem to be much use being anything else” (Sir Winston Churchill). Remain optimistic and of good cheer about yourself and others. Be tactful and thoughtful with requests. Diplomatically ask, teach, and suggest to people what they may want, and request permission for things you desire without being demanding.
After diligently working the same job for over two years a deserved vacation was assumed. At 21 years of age I told my boss about going on a planned trip to Spain for approximately one month, which necessitated that time off. The response to this unsolicited demand was an adamant denial. With further exploration and insight, asking to vacation in China for roughly the same duration was wise. The request was gladly granted by simply asking and not demanding. People will likely give us our desires through genuinely being thoughtful, polite, helpful, and considerate toward their views and desires.
Don’t be confined to living within the boundaries of a box by allowing a title or diploma dictate who you are or what you’re capable of becoming. You are a wonderful and miraculous child of God with untapped, yet infinite potential. Ask, seek, and find your calling so the universe can become infinitely better because you traveled through. Don’t ever give up seeking, asking or trying. Your time is now, therefore live deliberately, while valuing the moments. Remember that our moments create our lives and it only takes a moment to eternally change darkness into light. Constantly and persistently do more good, receive an abundance of blessings, and pay it forward in order to sow fertile seeds of love, peace, hope, joy, and goodness overflowing. Make your life matter as time evaporates into eternity.
“If you’re always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing you can be” (Maya Angelou). Plan and write out the first ten minutes of each day. Gradually increase the process duration to encompass your entire day. At least two times each month do something you have never done before and go someplace you’ve never been. These techniques can increase your self-control, intentionality, fortitude, and achievements by living outside your comfort zone. Be a self-starter as well as a finisher. Embrace your uniqueness.
Each day emulate Benjamin Franklin by asking, “What good shall I do today?” later followed by “What good have I done today?” Make a checklist of things not to do and what to take action on. Each time something is resisted place a checkmark by it every day of the week. Do the same for a separate list of taking action and character development goals. At the end of the day reflect upon your responses in order to recognize, accept, and embody new ways to improve. These methods can give you a sense of satisfaction through dopamine release, thus helping to reinforce and repeat positive behavior and run from poor conduct.
The world will go on without you, therefore be humble enough to let fear drive you to be fearless. We don’t own our past or future, only right now. Knowing in our souls that we are mere mortals and this present moment is all that exists, while at some unknown time, our state of existence and moments to experience love, warmth, embracing, giving, being, doing, laughing, and joy will fade from the earth can make seemingly fearful thoughts become insignificantly miniscule vapors of nonsensical emotions fleeting into oblivion. Any fear felt can be mitigated or eradicated through facing it head on and mastering what was once feared. Feel fear and do it anyway. Look yourself in the eye and say, “I will persevere and win, no matter what, because I am a winner!” Let fear fuel you to do what is uncomfortable, often, so you become better, hence more confident, competent, autonomous, and consequently, less fearful. Learn to embrace and enjoy fear as a growing and learning opportunity. Look at pain as a reason to self-reflect upon something that may need to be changed so states of harmony and peace may ensue.
A passionate desire to accomplish an aim with high energy levels leading to ultimate attainment of your vision is much easier through remaining in positive peak mental states. We all have ups and downs, although we can massively increase the upside, while minimizing the downside. Reduce and eliminate excuses, procrastinating, criticizing, blaming, gossiping, arguing, complaining, and toxic people from your life by not partaking in any of it or them. Don’t let other people’s negative opinions about you become your reality. Remain excited and confident about your vision while pursuing your dreams relentlessly, despite negative thoughts, feeling fear, and all circumstances. This is how winners win. Winners win. Quitters quit, permanently solving a temporary problem. If you don’t like something about yourself or your life, change it, by changing you first.
“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering” (Yoda). Be appreciative for all parts of your journey. Both the challenging and difficult times in life make us who we are. Live intentionally with a passionate purpose. In every situation, ask yourself, “What opportunity awaits me here?” Be a good-finder by seeking and expecting good, and you will find and have it.
“You can get a lot farther with a kind word and a gun than a kind word alone” (Al Capone). If a gun was held to your head or that of a family member and you were told you must stop a bad habit to prevent death, you could do it. That is called intrinsic motivation. We don’t want to coerce anyone, although we must sell ourselves in order to achieve our dreams. Desire the acquisition of dreams come true as badly as you crave the air you breathe. Dare to be original by being good and principled, while upholding steadfast concrete moral values and associate with people that sustain and reciprocate the like.
One decision can change the entire trajectory and destiny of our lives. Hanging out with a gang or the wrong crowd can lead to mischief, pain, suffering, and even death. If you associate with pigs you will get dirty, and the pigs will like it. Eradicate toxic people like a bad habit. While being truly serious about change, similar to stopping smoking, cold turkey typically works best.